Saturday, February 19, 2011

Out of the mouths of... old people.

If you don't know this already, I have the greatest job in the world.
Sometimes I have the sense to carry around a pad of paper and a pen to jot down all of the things I hear all day long.
Here are a few:


I am calling Bingo, holding a huge Bingo card up for everyone to see the letter and number:
P: Do you type? You use your fingers so well.
...
P: You have nice hands.

During stretch, talking about a co-worker:
S: Watch out for her. I knew her from the pen.

A co-worker talking about food:
K: Did you bake all of those pies and cakes?
S: Well, no! That's for poor people!

A conversation in the hallway:
Me: Can you talk out of the side of your mouth? (talking out of the side of my mouth)
L: Yes (talking out of the side of her mouth)
Me: Let's have a whole conversation like this. (talking out of the side of my mouth)
L: When? (talking out of the side of her mouth)
Me: Now! (talking out of the side of my mouth)
L: Let's hope we don't piss anyone off. (talking out of the side of her mouth)
[End scene]

Referring to my new hair:
D: I like your hair... sometimes.
...
D: Does it wash out?

I showed her the food I was chewing in my mouth:
D: You're revolting!

______________

If that didn't make you laugh, check out this blog. (Single Dad Laughing CRACKS ME UP!)
If you're too lazy to do that, just watch this:




I showed this to people at work, so I've seen it about... seven times? I'm still laughing at it. You know you want to try it. I did-- all day. And so did everyone else. HILARIOUS.

Have a lovely weekend! Cheers!

5 comments:

Gwiddle said...

Oh man I love the jems that my grandmother comes up with. How wise old people are. Okay so she has some dementia, but all the better to quote later right?? Oh man my husband always sings that lion king song. Especially when we first got our girl puppy. He would hold her up while singing it, kind of drives me nuts. Haha. Your lucky you get to deal with old people past the point of hormonal change, I work with all sorts of hormonal women. Pregnant hormonal women can be thee biggest brats! Have a great day sweet cakes! <--- get it?? Because you like to bake?? Okay so this comment makes no sense.. OH and I love that we are twitter pals:)

Breeanna @ a brilliant melody said...

You have some interesting conversations going on at work! I think I would carry a pen and pad of paper with me too!

Janette said...

Ok...So now I'm beginning to understand why you love your job...HILARIOUS! My favorite one was..."I like your hair..sometimes" Old folks are so brutally honest.. My favorite was when this lady told me, "you are very pretty...with makeup on..." LOL Oh boy.. They are great!

Janette, the Jongleur

Gale said...

BWAAAAHAHahAHHAHAhHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAaaaaaaaa!!!

Thank you liz! Oh man that video :D:D I love SDL too!

la petite lydia said...

Innnnteresting convos. :)